Advent Seasonal Reading

Hi everyone!  I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving and hopefully got in on some good shopping deals!  As I scour Facebook and Instagram, it is obvious that Christmas season is now fully upon us.  I wanted to share with you today a few Advent books that you can read by yourself or as a family this Advent season.

As a child, the word Advent really only pertained to this calendar that my mom put on our back door that was numbered up until Christmas day.  She would place a small candy cane in the pocket of which day we were on.  I remember waking up each morning though, and going to the Advent calendar, as she would sometimes leave us a special surprise in the pocket. 

Although I'd heard Advent talked about throughout my life, I really hadn't given it much more attention than that calendar though.  So when I saw these books, and the study from She Reads Truth, I really wanted to be able to slow down this year and prepare my heart for this season. 

The first book I'm reading is on my Kindle and is written by Louie Giglio.  If you've never heard this man speak, you are missing out.  This book has entries that are dated as of November 26th, so I went ahead this morning and read, read, read to catch up.  There is a scripture, a small devotional passage, a meditation, and a short prayer for each day.  Just having read the preface of this book though, I already learned quite a few things.  One thing I hadn't really considered before was that from the time of the last Old Testament prophet Malachi, to the time of Jesus' birth, there was a 400 year time span where God was silent.  Four. hundred. years.  And we get upset by not having our prayers answered in a few days hours time!  Can you just imagine going from knowing nothing from God to this bright blasting light one night, announcing the birth of the King?

I am also reading Ann Voskamp's The Greatest Gift: Unwrapping the Full Love Story of Christmas.  This reading starts on December 1st, so I've only read the Introduction for now.  The basis of this book though is to create a Jesse Tree and to add an ornament each day according to the reading.  You can learn more about Jesse Tree's here and here, but it is more or less a family tree that shows the generational progression to Jesus' birth.  Voskamp's book also provides a link for you to use to download her version of the ornaments for the Jesses tree.  I am thinking that this year, with Max still being so young, I am just going to do this on my own and add them to even a paper cut out of a tree.  I honestly really didn't even intend to do the tree, but I think it would be memorable and meaningful, so I'll give it a go! 

Next year, when Max is a little older, I intend to buy this book, which is written again by Ann Voskamp.  It goes pretty much in line with the previous book, but is more family friendly - illustrated pages and activities to do at the end of each day's reading (praying for people, thanking God for Jesus' arrival, etc.).

However, this year, I did get this book for Max.  It's a 9 day trek that takes you through the various characters that were present for the birth of Jesus and shares the story through their perspective.  Max will be receiving the Little People Nativity before Christmas, so I plan to use this book and this toy together. 

 

 



The last one I want to share with you is through the website She Reads Truth.  I have followed this site now through their last 4 studies, and they are great, small pieces.  Day 1 of their Advent study, O Come Let Us Adore Him, started just today, so you are still in luck!  If you want to download their app, it is available on both Apple and Android devices.  I get it on my Galaxy, and have to pay $1.99 for it, which really isn't anything bad!  Plus, they offer a daily scripture/quote that you can share on various social media platforms.  The photography is always beautiful on these.  If you're interested in this, I encourage you to read this invitation.

Graphic taken from www.shereadstruth.com

I hope this encourages you to check out a book or two of these!  Most of them are available for your Kindle, so you can get started right away!  Please let me know if you decide to read one of these or you're reading a different Advent book!  Happy reading, friends!

Girl's Getaway Saturday: Nashville

If there is one thing I love in this life, it is Nashville, Tennessee.  In fact, perhaps Tennessee in general is the thing I love most.  Besides all of the other important stuff in life of course.  Although I do consider myself a tried and true Texas, I know Tennessee is where I belong. 

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I love that Nashville is Southern.  I love the music scene.  I love Vanderbilt University.  I love the Grand Ole Opry.  I love that the Great Smoky Mountains are near.  I love that Nashville has this great Christian scene of artists and revolutionaries. 

So without further ado, for this weekend's edition of a Girlfriend's Getaway, we are traveling to none other than Nashville! 

I've been to Nashville twice before, but neither time did I stay in the heart of Nashville.  For this trip, that is an essential.  I chose the Omni in downtown Nashville for our imaginary stay.  There are several varieties of suites available, and the premier rooms are at the top 6 floors of the hotel to offer a great look at the city.  The hotel is also attached to the Country Music Hall of Fame Museum, which you have to check out at least once!

The Omni Downtown Nashville

Prices of the hotel range from 400 - 500 a night.  Nashville is worth is though, friends!

I love that mirror, by the way!

See/Do
     12 South- Very popular neighborhood in Nashville area. Restaurants, coffee shops, stores, and a Farmer's Market every Tuesday evening.
Imogene + Willie - Famous for their denim, but they have a good array of products.  It's housed in an old gas station and it's a good locale for people watching as well.

Grand Ole Opry, Country Music Hall of Fame, Music Row, Belle Meade, The Ryman.

Places to Eat
Jeni's Splendid Ice Creams - This Ohio-based ice cream shop can now also be found in Nashville.  It boasts that it is made from grass-fed cow's milk and local produce.  With flavors like Buttercup Pumpkin with Amaretti cookies, Middle West Whiskey Eggnog, and Cranberry Parfait Buttermilk Frozen Yogurt, this is not your same 'ole, same 'ole Baskin Robbins.  And if this place sounds interesting to you - you can order online from all 50 states! 

Middle West Whiskey Eggnog Ice Cream from Jeni's

Burger Up
     I'm focusing on restaurants in the 12 South district, and this is one that I've read about.  The same chef, Miranda Whitcomb Pontes, owns several restaurants in this area (Josephine and soon-to-be, Prima) and focuses on community through empowerment and respect (love this!). The menu certainly doesn't hurt my feelings either, with features such as the Woodstock burger - Benton's bacon, Tennessee sweetwater white cheddar, and Jack Daniel's maple ketchup, and any place with a patty melt is pretty much a good slice of heaven in my eyes as well.  Plus, the dessert menu features a Krispy Kreme donut pudding with grand marnier crème.  Hello coronary failure. 

Honestly, as I am drowning myself in reviews about breakfast, brunch, and dinner places, I can't pick.  So the links are all there, I am sure you will thank me later! 

Shopping
The Hip Zipper is a local vintage clothing shop that was recommended in Southern Living.

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Fanny's House of Music

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Katy K's Ranch Dressing


For more information:
My Pinterest Board
This blog post about spending 48 hours in Nashville.
Nashville Guru
This book

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And now....I really, really, really need to go back to Nashville.

Friday Favorites: Throw Blankets

Once that first hint of Fall weather rolls around, I can't help but to think about throw blankets.  The fluffier and softer, the better.  Today, I'm going to share a few I've seen around on the internet machine.


Crate and Barrel
I love both of these gray throws. The houndstooth price is a little more reasonable,  while the 2nd throw is in the 99 dollar range. 

I also love me a good Christmas throw.  I love this plaid one, but sadly it's already sold out on the website. 

Target
I could have scoured through 20 pages of throw blankets, but instead I'm just going to focus on some cream colored ones from my favorite store. I love each of these patterns, and as always, the price is always within my grasp!

Pottery Barn
The colors offered for these first two throws are just delicious.  I especially like the red. 

 

 

 

I'm not 100% over the chevron fad.  I am not a pink person, but I am liking the pink and orange combo here.  The mustard and ivory one though is my overall preference.  It's on sale too, so you should check it out here. 


Lands End

This chenille throw with the tassels looks so cozy.  I can envision it perched on the arm of a chair, just waiting for me to come and read a book while snuggled underneath. 

And you just simply cannot go wrong with a plaid throw.  This is perfect.  Simply perfect.  It is said to have the touch of cashmere, and at $49, it's really a pretty decent price. 


Today's Moral:  If you ever need to get me a gift, here are about 10 idea options for you!

What I've Been Reading: Yellow Crocus

     For the last week or so, I have been reading the book Yellow Crocus by Liala Ibrahim.

      


     Breastfeeding.  I don't think I've ever initially gotten "into" a book because of it's including breastfeeding, but this is what happened in this book.  This book follows two individuals, Mattie and "Lisbeth" - Mattie a "wet nurse" slave in the 1800's living on a plantation and Lisbeth, the white daughter of the plantation owners.  At the beginning of the book, Mattie is pulled from her own infant son to begin nursing the newborn master's daughter.  I was appalled and heartbroken by the idea of having to leave my own child to work for another woman in the frame of nursing. Honestly, I nearly stopped reading the book here just because I couldn't stomach the idea.  However, I kept on, and I'm glad I did.

     The book is apparently based on a true story.  The title is in reference to a yellow flower that was the first sign of spring in the book.  It's appearance resulted in a picnic including black eyed peas.  Sounds good to me! 

A yellow crocus

     The book is all about the relationship that Mattie and Lisbeth develop through the years.  Mattie is eventually allowed to go visit her son and family in the workers quarters on the weekends, and Lisbeth starts going with Mattie.  Soon, Lisbeth is teaching Samuel, Mattie's son, how to read and write.  The book transpires many years, from Lisbeth being a school age girl to her being a young woman. 

     I won't give all of the details away, but this was a good book.  There weren't any moments that were surprisingly edge-of-your-seat, but it was a good read.  If you like books that are about the pre-civil war days, I would definitely suggest this read! 

Small Potatoes

"So we're not giving up.  How could we!  Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace.  These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us.  There's far more here than meets the eye.  The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow.  But the things we can't see now will last forever."

2 Corinthians 4:16-18, The Message

When I was a junior in high school, I spent a weekend involved in a Disciple Now through a local church.  Several men came in from out of town to disciple to a group of rowdy teenagers.  Although I am sure that many good things were said, I don't recall much of it.  However, I do recall the home that we stayed in, and the owners of the home.  I hadn't really known the wife prior to this, but being one of the only girls at the weekend activity, she and I formed an easy, special relationship that weekend.  

Thirteen years later, she is still one of the dearest souls that I know.  She always has a sweet smile and a warm hug to offer to me.  She hosted my baby shower last summer.  When I wasn't living around here, she would always ask my mom about how I was doing.

And now, she has a rare form of terminal cancer.

When I first heard, I had to fight the tears, and as the news progressed in the following weeks, it became more and more difficult to hold them back.  

I saw her for the first time this last Sunday.  At church.  As faithful as ever (she's also still volunteering on Wednesday's at our Awana's club for children at church).  When she saw me, she offered her sweet smile, her warm hug, and a kiss for Max. She was beautiful.  Radiant.  A little thinner, but her spirit was so full.  

How can this be small potatoes to her?  This thing that seems so tragic to me as an onlooker.  Even with the knowledge that her form of terminal cancer should allow her to live a long life....it's CANCER.  It's real.  Something is in her body killing her.  

And yet, she lives as though it truly is her small potatoes.  You can see God's unfolding grace on her life.  You know there is a lavish celebration that is prepared for her, even if it is on the other side of earth.  

She gives me such courage to make the most of my small potatoes.  

When I look at my own life, I wonder what things are my small potatoes?  Divorce?  Single motherhood?  Something else?  

More importantly, am I living like they are small potatoes?  

I think I know the answer....my potatoes tend to be scientifically enlarged potatoes.  Potatoes-through-the-side-view-mirror-potatoes.  

I yearn to live a life that is focused on the lavish celebration that is coming and not on the present trials.  Help me God to focus on more than what my eyes can see.  

I won't give up.  I haven't yet.  Not even when the things are looking like they are falling apart.  I press you to not give up either.  

Even if cancer is in your body.  Even if your bills are overwhelming you and you're hardly surviving.  Even if your marriage is crumbling.  Even if your job is not bringing you joy. Even if your kids are driving you crazy and you can't get this mommy thing right.  Even if your favorite family member is ill. Even if your womb hasn't opened up yet. Even if.  

God will make new life and give you his unfolding grace.  Your small potatoes that are going on aren't going to compare to the things that are going to be.  Keep going.  Never, never, never give up dear one.  

Dear Max: The First Snow

Dear Max,

     Yesterday was the first snow of the season, and I missed getting to see your eyes full of wonder as you experienced it.  It wasn't the first time you've seen snow in your life, but it was the first time that you were old enough for it to really matter. 

     As I drove you to your Dad's house, I saw the clouds looming overhead.  Your Pop had texted Nana and said there was snow out near where he was in the oilfield.  All the signs pointed to it heading this way, and yet, I was still willing for it to hold off.

     It wasn't long after I dropped you off that Nana texted me while I was busy working at the school, to tell me it was snowing.  I walked out into the hallway, and as soon as I saw it, my eyes filled with tears.  Not because I don't like snow.  But because I wasn't getting to experience it with you. 

     Fear mounted as I began to wonder about you.  Were you warm enough?  Were you out in the snow instead of bundled up inside?  Did you even notice the snow? 

     Soon your dad texted me pictures of you looking out the window of the truck, and there were those eyes of wonder.  It was both exciting and heart breaking to see.



     Although Nana reminded me that at Christmas this year, I would be able to witness you with plenty of snow, as we will be spending it in Ruidoso, it couldn't keep me from wondering.  What other things will I only see pictures of, and not get to see you experience in the flesh?  How many other things will I just hear stories about after it happened, but not get to be a part of it first-hand? 

     And yet, no matter how much that thought stinks and makes my heart ache, I have to take in consideration how many things I get to see that your Dad misses out on.  I get to see you wake up every morning, the smile almost instantly on your lips.  I get to be excited as you try some new food, whether it's dumplings or grapes or cottage cheese.  I get to hear new words.  See new moves.  Go to new places.  I don't say these things out of pride, but out of gratitude.
 
     I'm sorry that you live in a world where it's "this parent or that parent" that gets to see it.  Please know that when you were forming in my body, I never intended for you to only get an "either or" life.  I don't really have all of the answers on how I'm going to make sure that everything turns out just fine for you regardless of that, but I promise you, I'm going to.  I'm praying for my relationship with your Dad.  Things are getting better.  I want them to continue getting better too, especially for your sake. 

     Son, no matter how many things I miss out on, please, please know that I will be excited to hear about them.  To see the pictures.  To be a part of it in any tiny increment, even if I have to hold back some sadness. I will be excited because you are getting to experience these things. 

And please know, no matter what, I love you more than the stars in the sky.

Love,
Your Mom

Sweet Sunday: Pumpkin Cheesecake Trifles

Please tell me I'm not the only Pinterest-addicted-person that swoons over and over again at a particular recipe, yet rarely gets around to testing it out?  Well, this is how the story has gone with this pumpkin cheesecake trifle recipe that I am sharing with you today.  It is the first pin on my "All Things Pumpkin" board, and I had even gone so far as to having bought all of the ingredients several weeks ago. But I just wasn't getting around to make it...until now.

I got the recipe from the blog My Baking Addiction, and you can catch her recipe here.  Not only are her pictures about 7,000 times better than mine....but her trifles are about 52,000 times prettier.  Good thing I believe in the adage that the taste is what counts. 

If you need to whip together a quick and yummy dessert, and you and your guests like pumpkin, this is ideal.  I went back later to taste a bit of it after it had chilled some....and the next thing I knew, the mason jar was somehow empty! 

The original recipe called for biscoff cookies, but seeing as how I live in the middle of nowhere, ginger snaps was what I ended up using. 

Pumpkin Cheesecake Trifles
Ingredients:

-12 gingersnap cookies, crushed
- 1 tablespoon of butter melted
- 8 ounces of cream cheese, softened
- 1/2 cup sugar
- 1 cup pure pumpkin puree
- 1 teaspoon vanilla
- 2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice
- 12 ounce tub of whipped topping (I made due with an 8 oz. tub, but you can never have enough cool whip!)

After you've melted the butter and crunched up the cookies, mix them together in a medium sized bowl.  Press a layer down into the bottom of each of your trifle dishes (I used 4 half pint mason jars).

Next, using an electric mixer, mix the cream cheese in a large bowl until smooth.  Add in sugar, pumpkin, vanilla and pumpkin pie spice. 

Once you've mixed it all together, spoon in about half of the tub of whipped topping. 

Now, just alternate layers of the cheesecake mixture and the leftover whipped topping until you get to the top of your dish. You can add some more ginger snap crumbles on the top if you wish (you should wish).  Keep your containers in the fridge and pull them out when you're ready to indulge!

Also, I had a lot of the cheesecake mixture left, so I plan to just use it as a dip for fruit or more ginger snaps.  Cream cheese should never be wasted.  Never.

Girls Getaway Saturday: Albuquerque and Santa Fe, NM

On Saturdays, we dream.

 

This Saturday,  we are dreaming of going on a girl's getaway to Albuquerque and Santa Fe, New Mexico. While I have been to both of these places, it was not as part of a girl's trip. But being of the girl variety and believing that I tend to know what women want, I'm just going to dream away, and you're coming with me!

 

 

Albuquerque
There is a farm on the outskirts of Albuquerque that I will stay at at some point in my life, no matter what. I've been to it before, but just long enough to take a gander in the shop on the premises and wander around the property. Los Poblanos Historic Inn and Organic Farm is a beautiful location.  The property consists of 20 guest rooms spanning across 25 acres of land. It's listed on Fodor's 100 Hotels for Local Flavor. The drive into the Inn is tree lined and calming, and there was a field of sunflowers when I went before.

 

 The entrance into the Historic Farm

 

 

 

There are quite a few farm animals on hand for you to check out.

(Aren't you glad I included that tidbit of information in there....instead of making

you think I was just posting a picture of a random cow?)

 

Rooms range from $180 - $260 a night and there are various packages that you can add that include beer tasting, bike tours, or a museum tour.  Dinner is served each evening, Wednesday - Sunday. In addition to accommodations, the farm offers a variety of culinary classes, fireside book talks, yoga classes, and a great shop offering a good selection of lavender products among other items. Sounds like the making of a perfect girl's trip to me!

 

Photo taken from National Geographic

 

Santa Fe
Where to Stay:  I'm going to list an option of a hotel in Santa Fe, as well as a rental home, just to cover all the bases!  As far as the home goes, I looked no further than airbnb.com.  My brother introduced me to this website a while back.  Although some of the listings on this site you can also find on homeaway and vrbo.com also, I feel like airbnb has a more eclectic style, which I think is a must for a girl's getaway! 

The house listing can be found here and is listed as a 3 bedroom historic adobe home.  The furnishings are historic Santa Fe'an with some Japanese influence.  You will have to click on the link to check it out, it's truly a beautiful home! It's a hefty $300+ a night, but what is money when you're dreaming?

As far as a hotel, I went with Inn of the Five Graces. According to their history page, the five graces are in actuality the five senses. The décor is really a little over the top for my liking, but it is rated as the number 1 hotel in Santa Fe by Trip Advisor with 375 reviews, so I'm okay with going with the people's choice here.  The hotel features a variety of suite options, as well as a 2 bedroom house.  Wine and cheese is offered every evening at 5 pm, and according to one reviewer, the hotel staff was happy to even book restaurant reservations for them.  Trip Advisor lists the nightly rates in the 500 dollar range though. Ouch. Definitely think I'd be opting for the house!

Where to Eat
Okay, the truth is, I just previewed this post and it is longer than some books.  So, here's the consolidated version of where to eat.  Santa Fe has hundreds of restaurants.  Most of the hundreds of restaurants serve margaritas or wine.  Margaritas and wine (in moderation) are tasty.  So pick one of those places that serves those two items and you are pretty much in luck of picking a good place to eat.  The end.

Where to Shop
There are tons of overly expensive shops in the Santa Fe area.  The only are I am going to highlight though is the Farmer's Market and Railyard area.  I love me a good farmer's market, and Santa Fe had one that I swooned over.  You can learn more about it here, but it had beautiful produce in an outdoor space and just as lovely homemade items in their indoor market.  The Santa Fe Railyard area has a great number of shops, restaurants, and attractions. My favorite shop was Le Bon Marche where I got my mom an apron and myself a cute tote bag. 

Photo taken from Le Bon Marche website

So all I need to know now, is who wants to join me and make this trip a reality, and when are we going to do it?

Thanks for reading.  Join me tomorrow for "Sweet Sunday" as I share with you a great pumpkin treat!

Friday Favorites

It is Friday afternoon.  That means that my teacher ID tag is off, and I can just be a "regular" 30 year old female.  If regular means changing into sweat pants as soon as I walk through the door, planning on being asleep by 9 tonight, and being super excited about the possibility of getting to watch a movie this weekend, or at the very least catching up with my Nashville watching. 

Have I mentioned I should be living in Nashville?

Anyways, I digress.  Today, I am sharing with you a particular favorite that I am so into currently:  gold foil items.  Now I have to be honest.  If last year, you had told me that this year, I would be wearing gold jewelry and digging anything gold in general, I would have told you to get real.  In fact, someone that knew this Kelsey from last year saw me wearing something in gold recently and laughed and made a comment.  Fashion is ever evolving people.  I can like gold if I choose to.  

Don't even get me started on the fact that I ridiculed both gold things and anything with a heart on it and now I even have a gold bracelet that has a heart on it. 

And because nothing is truly a favorite until you have a Pinterest board with at least 20 items pinned to it, check this out.

One of my favorite items that is a gold foil item is this top from the Etsy shop SheIsClothing.

 I bought this shirt last month after it had been sold out in my size for a while and feel so empowered when I wear it!  Plus, isn't she just beautiful?!

This next piece was one of the original gold foil items that caught my eye.  I've seen similar ones in Etsy shops, but haven't made my way to buying one yet!  You can order this poster here.

 

 

And if you're the DIY type, this might be right up your alley!  Check out this DIY gold foil polka dot shirt over at DIYcandy.com.

Speaking of DIY, you can purchase your own gold vinyl material to entertain your gold foil project dreams from dear ole' Amazon.

And if money is no object, how about dishing out a few hundred dollars for these lovely business cards? 

The final item I'm sharing today is another top that my slightly moderate shopping addiction caused me to purchase lately was this cute top, perfect for Thanksgiving.  Buy it here.

So if you can take anything away from this --- don't be afraid to wear gold, DIY with gold, live gold.  And especially don't be afraid to sparkle, gold-wearing or not! 

Happy Weekend, friends!

What I've Been Reading

For the last month or so, I 've been participating in the Incourage Bloom Book study of  "Let's all be Brave: Living Life with Everything you Have" by Annie F. Downs.  May I first just say that this book and the way that Annie writes...I am pretty sure we could (and possibly should) be best friends.  What talent to be able to write with such a warmth, casualness, and that ever-present sarcastic tone that caused me to feel as though I was sitting around a dinner table, drinking a glass of wine, and listening to her reverberate to me "be Brave, Kelsey, just be brave!" I'm not sure if Annie F. Downs would be drinking a glass of wine with me, but I think she'd be okay with me having a glass.  Plus, her giving me the GPS of each chapter sealed the deal that I could become her stalker - but it also made me feel like I was a part of this writing.  I wasn't sure what the coffee shops looked like, but I sure could envision them (especially the "Dark Side" of Portland Brew in the chapter "Everything you Have").

Besides just finding Annie F. Downs completely lovely, her book resonated deeply with me.  The first few chapters, I was riding in the backseat with my son, Max, as the rest of my family was headed home from a day of shopping.  As he slept, and my mom drove, I read.  And cried.  And cried. And cried. Perhaps I didn't know it prior to my reading this book, but I am in a stage of life where I am certainly being called to bravery.  Now that I'm on the other side of this book, I sure wish I had more clarity on how and when and what exactly my brave is needing to be, but I know my reading this had a purpose. 

In the chapter titled Believe, Annie states "you haven't sinned your way out of your calling, and you haven't lost your chance to make a difference for Christ" (p. 45). The opposite is something that Satan whispers to me quite often: that I'm all used up and there isn't anything that God can use me for now.  Annie talks about knowing deep in my "knower" that I want to be brave.  That is exactly what Satan wants me to ignore...and thus those "used up" lies are fed to me in those quiet moments in not-so-quiet ways.  Perhaps part of my being brave is just knowing that I'm going to choose to walk in believing that I can still be used. 

Below are a few quotes that meant a great deal to me that were focused on during the videos on the Incourage website. 

I could spend a bit of time reviewing quite a few different portions of this book, but I am going to focus on 2 areas that really meant a lot to me.  In the chapter "Everything you Have,"  Annie talks about a specific topic that is close to her, despite it not being her desire.  She wrote of how God had called her to write about her singleness even though it was an area she had not wanted to delve into.

 Although I am not "always been single"  I am single again, again.  I've started blogs before, wanting to write about what it's like to be a single mom, and I just couldn't get anything out.  After reading this chapter, I get that it wasn't my time to be writing about being a single mom.  Maybe it won't ever be my time to write about being a single mom (though with my intention of being a 'forever' single mom....I'm looking up to the heavens right now muttering "It would sort of be a waste Lord to not use this..." but who am I to say). On page 160, Annie writes that she is living a life that she had never planned to be living.  Same story, sister. I truly never intended on having all this history to me and to not have much to show for it (other than Max and my story).  Some days it stinks and shame presses against me.

However, this ties into the 2nd chapter that meant a great deal to me -   "Why".  The idea of being a trailblazer on this course that I am on.  This course that so often feels like I am in this jungle completely surrounded by overgrowth.  The visibility is 0.  I don't know how to do all of this.  How to be a single mom raising a boy to be in love with Christ.  How to revolutionize a community.  How to possibly change careers.  How to be a single mom and somehow home school my child.  There are so many trails that I feel like I am traversing on currently.  That I could be a trailblazer in any of them is simply too marvelous to think of.  But at the same time, is there anything else I'd rather be?

Like I said, I'm not certain of what exactly my Brave is being called to look like after having finished this book.  But I am certain of one thing.  I want to keep seeking it out.  Day by day,  One little inch of my map at a time.  I don't want to cower in the corner and just be a watcher in life.  And I want to be able to call the brave out in others.

Dear Lord, give me eyes and ears to see and hear the brave things that others are carrying out.  And please God, give me the feet to travel my brave distances that you have for me.